Dr.Joseph Riggio

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Why: What I Do Might Be For You

 

Remember … we’ve all got to start somewhere …

 

To Begin – Keeping “IT” Simple:

If You Want To Be Truly Living
“The Adventure Of Your Life” …

To Step Into The Adventure Of Your Life …

To Know That The Adventure You Are On Is Yours, And Yours Alone …

The Presence Of A Guide And Magic Helper To Stand Alongside You In The Adventure You Are On

Then You Surely May Have Found “IT”

 

Let’s Begin At The Beginning Again …

 

If you’ve come this far into my website you’re probably at least getting the feeling that this I’m not your father’s therapist, consultant or confidant. What I do is probably very much at an obtuse angle to that path.

To keep it simple, the work I do with clients is really just about two, or maybe three, things at most.

  • First, it’s about finding your unique path – or the “way of being” that is uniquely your own, the one welded into you at birth … or before
  • Next, it’s about reconnecting with your primal core – this is the center of your being where your unspoiled instincts and intuitions reside, a place from which you can make positive, powerful decisions that are aligned with who you most truly are
  • Finally, it’s about uncovering your “Success Blueprint” – I was taught, studied, witnessed and come to believe that we are each endowed with a unique way of operating at our best, when we are most aligned both with ourselves and in relation to what I call “that which is greater than self” … our relationships, society, the environment, nature, G-d … you choose what works for you, but we all exist in relation to something more than just ourselves no matter how thinly held

 

“If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things through narrow chinks of his cavern.”
- William Blake

 

[Image From: Free Christ Images: William Blake]

 

When we work together we’ll begin with establishing answers regarding each of these three things I point to above …

“What is your unique path?” —

How are you when you know yourself to be completely true to yourself, when you’ve stepped beyond the impositions of your enculturation and education, when your most being yourself? This is a position that is either completely unknown or rarely glimpsed by most people in today’s world. Yet virtually all of my clients come to me seeking to uncover this way of being in the world, to begin at least setting aside the impositions of their upbringing, the expectations of others, the role they’ve been led to believe they must fulfill … and all of the baggage that comes with that.

“How are you when you are deeply connected to a profound, primal sense of aliveness?” —

What is it like for you to know you are truly alive and experiencing all that means … the sensation of inhabiting your body in a fully human way? When you are reconnected to your primal senses you are reawakened to the essence of what it is to be alive … what Aldous Huxley described in “The Doors of Perception“ … as ranging from “the purely aesthetic” to “sacramental vision.” It’s about the re-enchantment of life that happens when you open yourself again to the childlike wonder of simply being alive.

 ”How do you do what you do when success and satisfaction come to you easily, effortlessly and naturally?” —

This is like establishing a new beginning point for everything. There is a way, welded within you,  that you operate from when you are at your best, i.e.: completely aligned and wellformed regarding yourself and the moment you are in and experiencing. When you operate from this position you are in what my mentor, teacher and friend, Roye Fraser, called “the excitatory bias” – referring to a way of operating, that is neurologically based, where you consider possibilities instead of problems. Using his language for this way of operating you “go to to where the problem is NOT.” Starting from this position you manifest incredible optimism, energy and a pervasive sense of wellbeing associated with taking action in the world.

 

The Delta — “The Difference That Makes The Difference“

Most people learn along the way that those things most worthwhile are based in striving and struggling, but life is not designed to be a struggle for mere survival. The illusion we’ve been taught and told about the “primitive struggle for survival” passes for some ill-cast representation of our primal past, but it is patently untrue!

Our ancient ancestors likely worked no more than twenty hours a week providing for themselves fully … and then spent the remainder of their time in company of others whom they cherished … exchanging stories, signing, dancing, romancing … making love … having the experience of their lives. Yet in today’s world most people relegate having the experience of their lives to the weekends, holidays and the infrequent gatherings with those they cherish.

But this is not the way it has to be for you any longer …

When you are on your path, living from your center and operating at your best, like I put it above,  “life becomes effortless and natural” … there is no struggle, and even striving becomes a thing of the past. You’ll reach a point where it becomes not only possible, but obvious to give up the way of life that preaches struggling and striving to survive and prosper.

Another aspect of the same propagated illusion is that striving is essential, and more than that entirely beneficial, e.g.: “What meaning would life have if you weren’t striving for something?” … this isn’t only illusional it’s delusional … and prevents you from having the experience of your life.

It is entirely possible to have a completely fulfilled and fulfilling life simply by living your life fully … experiencing what is present, doing your work, making a contribution, enjoying the fruits of your labors … AND … exchanging stories, signing, dancing, romancing … making love. But that’s a choice you’ll have to make, not something that more striving will allow you to arrive at someday after you’ve accomplished whatever it is your pursuing so vigorously now.

Having the experience of YOUR life begins with giving up the proposition, “I’ll be able to have “IT” when I first have (fill in the blank … money, love, education … whatever).”

 

Getting Ahead Ain’t Always All It’s Cracked Up To Be

In the movie, “There Will Be Blood” with the great actor Daniel Day-Lewis we get to see a life of striving exemplified. It begins with a simple man who wants to get ahead, and is willing to do what it takes in terms of blood, sweat and tears to make it. He strikes a small load of silver and his ascent to success as he’s defined it begins – we could sum up his philosophy as “striking it rich.” 

The story progresses and he moves on from silver mining to oil prospecting, and he’s somewhat successful – despite the costs, including the lives of the men working the oil fields. In one scene a man dies, leaving behind a son that Daniel Day-Lewis’ character adopts. There is affection between the man and the boy, but he is not beyond using him to convince poor farmers to sell him their land rights cheaply. As the film progresses he continues to achieve success after success, accumulating what can only be assumed to be enormous wealth – but leaving behind carnage in his wake. He ends up alone, estranged from his son, and bludgeoning a man to death, stating the obvious, “I’m finished“ when his man in waiting comes to see what is happening.

This story is the metaphor for the life many of us have been sold, i.e.: work hard, accumulate wealth, live the “good life” … and make whatever sacrifices are necessary to those ends. It is a choice of course, not a given … but as I’ve said there is another way.

 

Uncovering Your Myth …

Joseph Campbell, the world renowned mythologist whose map of the human story “The Hero’s Journey” has become the basis for innumerable blockbusters in film and best-selling novels, suggests that we are all living a myth. The great 20th century psychologist, Carl Jung, said our challenge is discovering the myth we are living.

“Working with applied mythology has held a central place in my life – both for myself and in the work I do with clients.” - Joseph Riggio, Ph.D.

 

Whether we know it or not we all organize our lives around a narrative that defines us and drives us forward (or keeps us stuck) in our lives – this is our life story. What I do is work with my clients to guide them in uncovering that story, the myth they are living.

  • First things first, is  the myth you are living is your own? 

  • If it isn’t (which BTW is likely), deciding to find the myth you, and you alone, contain is the starting point 

  • Then, having uncovered your unique, personal myth begin to re-organize your life around “IT” 

This to my way of thinking is the work of a lifetime, and work well worth doing.

We have work to do, if …

  • You wonder if the life you are leading is truly your own or one imposed upon you

  • You know that you want to be living inside of and from a myth other than the one you are living today

  • You want to be living your myth fully, the one that is yours, and uniquely yours alone

Finally, if you want to realize the boon of your personal myth …

Then we should make time to speak and discuss how you might begin living the Adventure of Your Life … this is indeed work worth doing … and “IT” is the work I do. 

 

What Can You Expect From The Work We Do?

I’ll keep this really short and simple.

First of all:

  • Expect to see and experience a dramatic improvement in your performance across the board

  • You will naturally and effortless begin making high-quality decisions for yourself and in regard to others 

  • Work will become a way to express who you are … leading to a sense of contribution and profound satisfaction

  • Your relationships will blossom, deepen and become more rewarding

  • You will begin to be what you imagine becoming …

These are some of the markers you could begin to notice emerging in your life as as result of the work we do together.

 

How Will These Things Happen?

 Keeping it simple you will begin to uncover the essence of what it is to make high-quality decisions from your own center and sense of well-begin. Rather than struggling or striving to “fix problems” or “resolve issues” … or even “add in what’s missing” … you’ll be working from a starting point where you are already wellformed, feeling whole, complete and satisfied.

This is what some people refer to as having high self-esteem. It is also commonly talked about as confidence. On the outside it is seen by others as having presence and charisma.

 

My word for it is ”INTENT“

 

Some of what you will arrive at in our work together is an irrefutable sense of what it is to be present … to be fully aware of yourself … to know what it is like when you are operating at your best, and how to do that on demand … to become sensitive to the experience others are having and to be able to respond to them and interact with them in the most effective possible way.
However, if I had to boil it down to the simplest possible terms I’d say there are a few things that make all the difference …
  • The lens of your perception will be swept clear of distortion

  • You will become extraordinarily able to choose the meaning you apply to your experiences

  • Your decision-making will be acute and precise in relation to the outcomes you most desire

  • Your behavior will become a direct expression of who you know yourself to be, and directly aligned with the results you intend to produce … both on your own and with others

If any or all of this sounds exciting to you, let’s make plans to speak …

 

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There are 6 billion people in the world and every single one is a diamond in some stage of being polished. Life is either going to polish you up or grind you down. And the difference between the two lies in how much hope you have, how much faith you have in the fact that you do carry something special on the inside... that's waiting to get out. Many give up, not knowing they were only 10 minutes from triumph.
- Perry Marshall

I have known of Joseph for more than 13 years. However, it took about 10 years before I let him into my life at all. Over all that time he never pressured me to engage with what he has to offer. I flirted with the idea of working with him on a number of occasions … and then retreated again! This is a reflection of where I was in my life and his great acuity to see that it was for me to be ready for a meaningful engagement.

I have worked with a number of executive coaches over the years and have had mixed experiences. A common outcome was that I ended up feeling that the coach that I was working with was colluding with me and hence not supporting / pushing or enabling me to make the break throughs that I was seeking in my professional (and personal) life and self.

After a stand off of nearly 10 years I let down my guard … a little. Well, approaching 50 seemed like a good time to grow up and start enjoying all the blessings in my life. As I have got over my lack of “trust” for coaches / advisors / mentors based on self fulfilling prophecies that had repeated in my life, I let Joseph in. As I started to trust him I have found that I have had life changing experiences – in my professional, family and personal fulfilment. That does not mean that it has always been easy – and indeed I believe that is part of why I have been able to make fundamental shifts in how I am experiencing my life. In my interactions with Joseph he is relentless in his pursuit of the outcomes that I am seeking in my life – many times this is frustrating for me; at other times it is non-sensical. However, the more I trust him and the ways he works with me the more profound and transformational the changes that I am experiencing.

From trying to control everything in my life and taking things way too seriously – I am now more able to see things more for what they are – to others as well as myself – to laugh at myself and with others more, and to meet life as it unfolds.

So thank you Joseph for the ongoing gifts that you share with me and for the journey that we share.

- Hilary Samson-Barry

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